Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Things I've Learned in 5 Days


My chickie pea is 5 days old. I can't believe it's only been 5 days since the moment she entered the world. I feel like we have been in our little Reilly bubble for weeks! I've learned so much in these 5 days. More than I ever thought I would know about motherhood, a 5 day old little angel, or myself. I thought I'd share some of the things I have realized & come to learn, as I type with one hand and my baby on my chest.

1. I can type with one hand and a baby on my chest! It's my favorite feeling in the whole world.

2. Reilly likes sleeping with her hands above her head. It's very precious.

3. Putting every need of you baby's before yourself is the easiest thing in the world. It honestly is. I haven't thought about myself in 5 days, I can barely remember to eat, but it doesn't even matter. And it's not like a noble, self righteous, "I am such a sacrificial mother" type of thing...it's just that as soon as she was here, I have had no other care in the world. It just happened naturally, and it's an amazing thing. Seriously, I thought I was selfish! I mean, I'm as giving as the next person, but I don't always want to share my cupcake is all I'm saying. And suddenly I'm giving my whole self to my girl, and haven't even thought twice.

4. I don't require that much sleep after all! I don't require any, evidently. I have been "sleeping" in 1 to 2 hour intervals during the night, due to breastfeeding. Newborns need to eat about every 2 hours all day and night when they are primarily breastfeeding, especially in the beginning. And since she was born, I have not slept a whole night. And I'm still functioning at a relatively normal level! I look a little exhausted I imagine, although husband keeps saying I got more beautiful since becoming a Mama. I think sometimes he lies. :) Just teasing honey!

But if you told my teenage self that I would not be sleeping at all, and not even really care, she would laugh at you.Come to think of it, so would my college self. And my twenty three year old pregnant self! I pretty much always thought 10 hours sleep was required of my body. Everything really does change with the little bambino.

5. I have trouble finishing a glass of wine. I actually have yet to finish one whole glass. I take tiny sips, and nurse the one glass, so afraid of it affecting me and then affect my milk. I've never refused a glass of wine, or two, or eleven. And here I am afraid to have one! She is such a little precious chickpea. She makes me fear wine.

6. Back to sleeping. Because it really shocks me how my sleeping could/has changed. And that I'm not biting people's heads off every day as a result. I learned that I'm no longer a heavy sleeper. I didn't used to just be a heavy sleeper...I used to be a comatose sleeper. When I was younger and growing up, our house alarm went off one night and I slept right through it. This occurred multiple times. I kindly asked my family to just grab me out of bed if there were to be an actual intruder.

But now, I hear tiny little inhales of breath from the bassinet at the foot of our bed, and wake up diving to the end of the bed to look at her face. I naturally keep a light on all night in order to make this possible. Then I stare at her looking for signs of distress, realize she has the hiccups, and resume my semi-sleep-nap for the next 30 minutes before the next feed/change.
p.s. I hope you are not still wondering why I haven't blogged in 5 days. :)


7. I learned that I actually could love my husband more than I did. I thought I couldn't. I was so in love with everything he is, as my best friend and my protector and my love and my partner in crime. But seeing the way he looks at his little girl. It's like nothing I've ever experienced. She makes him laugh like nothing else I've ever seen just by scrunching up her nose. He changes her, and just stares at her tiny feet and asks her never to grown any bigger. Through watching him and her, I can feel the love that he has for his two girls. I feel more loved by him, and more love for him, every time he looks at her. It's hard to explain, but it's one of the most amazing things I've ever seen happen. As much as I've learned about motherhood, I've learned a good amount about fatherhood in the past 5 days as well. Mostly, the unbelievable transformation that a babygirl can have on a grown man. The funniest part is, the little Belle has no idea what she's done to her Daddy in 5 short days.

More to come on Baby Rei, as her naps allow :)
Coming next...The Labor Story!

Love,
dirt road Mama & dirt road Baby

2 comments:

  1. You are experiencing the most wonderful, magical moments that you will ever experience in your life. And your narration of you experiences and feelings are beautiful. I love reading your posts! You were MADE to be a mother. I know that, just by the way you speak, by the way you say you feel. It's exactly why God made mothers. :) I'm so happy for you Kate!! Can't wait to hear about the labor story too! xo

    ReplyDelete
  2. <3 dirt road mama and dirt road baby! I love it!!!!!

    ReplyDelete